Embracing my introvert-self
I have always been fifty percent introvert and fifty percent extrovert. Being a social butterfly is easy for me. I love meeting new people and knowing their story but lately, I've had some disappointments in friendships. Those disappointments, unfortunately, have led me into a mindset where I don't want to get close to anyone for fear that one day we might grow apart. After almost 15 years of friendship my former best friend and I have ended our friendship. We took a trip to Paris this summer and things changed. We changed, into different people. She might be going through some anxiety issues and she has pushed me away. Because I have seen her do this to other friends before, I knew my day to be pushed away would eventually come too. Nevertheless, it is what it is.
Other friendships have gone dull for several years. Hey, its life and it happens. Sometimes, I can make excuses to miss hangout nights, with the unrealistic promise of "I'll be there next time". Because of that some friends have neglected to invite me to special events in their life. Which hurts but I understand why, to some extent. What I wish my friends, those friends, would understand is that yeah I probably won't make it to little hangouts but I will try my best to make it to special events such as weddings, baby showers, and heck even graduations.
Because of this I have decided to go M.I.A for some time. Six months' worth of time or maybe more. Oh, and did I mention, I have also gotten braces which interferes with the whole food-and-socializing fun thing. It may sound silly but you know that friend that always orders an appetizer with their drinks? Well, I am that friend and It's just not the same to sit in a bar while attempting to eat a chicken strip without making an ugly pain-driven face. I give up! So, M.I.A it is. But this doesn't mean I am totally out of the scene. I'll make it to those special events and stay for a couple of hours. That's all my friends can get out of me.
For my upcoming birthday, on October the 25th, I am just spending it with family, at a new family-friendly hot spot. Maybe i'll even throw in a good loner workout sess and buy a new book. This has been my life for the past month or so and with guilt, I will admit that, I am enjoying being an introvert.